my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Randomize
