My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
