i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
