so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
