Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
