How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I just want to make out with him forever
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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