why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
