I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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