I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
