Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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