i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I think weed is turning my hair brown
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
