she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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