You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
