Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
