You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Randomize
