I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
My pussy is not your playground.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
