I wish I could teleport
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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