I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
