Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize