you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
