Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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