i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Randomize
