I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
