the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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