Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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