If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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