Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
whose ass print is on the piano?
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Randomize
