singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
