Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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