Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
