Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
So. Much. Porn.
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