Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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