so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
