just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
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