How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
