Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize