I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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