Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
