I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
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