Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
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