so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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