you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
