do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
