Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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