I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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