I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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