dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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