is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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