Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
she smelled like a LAN party
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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