i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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